ok, I'll roll over though, but I'll put the lotion on the front, not that you wouldn't volunteer I'm sure!
I hate tan lines!

Also we need to keep a look out for the government Mole, they always get in to these things.
If you are a government mole then declare yourself now and you will get a quick, painful death.

If you are found out, it will be a slow, painful death.
Your choice,
Gamerbird

*YAWN*
Sorry just woke up. What horribly fun things have I missed? *Sees memo*

I'll do what you have left over on the list. I'd prefer one of the techy, sciency, jobs over the office jobs.

Sorry, Fester, I think I'm getting out of popping corn. I need larger explosions than those caused by the conversion of liquid to vapor.

Maybe I can find a lesser-death ray to fiddle with. I'm sure there must be one floating around here somewhere.

i'll take weapons developmant or military.side note. the zombies like peanut butter and are immune to all types of radiation all they do is grow extra limbs which is not a bad thing.one other thing.the candy also effects animals so i think we should consider the possibilaty of an animal zombie army

Rhs88, I am shocked. SHOCKED. I have not felt so betrayed since it turned out that that guy who runs through here laughing has a better salary than me. That was, unfortunately for him, during my poisoned bear trap phase. The laughing was a lot more strained that month, and that's all i'm saying. Anywhoo, on the dual occult/snackfood front, I've managed to get some friendly (yet evil) demons to infest some of the popcorn, and ectoplasmic baguette production is up by 4.76%. However, Josh900, could you PLEASE stop your undead minions opening my summoning portals. It takes ages to reset the runes, and the zombies have taken to drawing smiley faces in the powdered dragonskull dust, and you KNOW i have to order that specially from the middle ages! I tell you, the tax on ordering things from the past is simply ridiculous. Its not like there's a recession in the 1600s...... (checks, sees 'plague' and 'fire') Hey, guys these folks really know how to throw a party!!

Also, humanbean, don't forget to pay the gas bill tomorrow, as I'm really using the incenerators alot lately...

Does anyone remember Tammy? The girl who used to work in Human Resources, up until your aforementioned bear-trap incident? She thought 'knock-knock' jokes were hysterically funny, and when Laughing Boy had his interview with her... well... she thought he was seriously flirting with her. That's how he wound up with a salary that big, and Tammy following him around for a while until she stepped in one of your traps.



What gas bill? We've been holding the meter-guy's daughter in cell 58 for months, now.

To be fair, do we really want to employ any non-zombie who doesn't notice bear traps because they're in love with LAUGHING BOY (sorry, were in love mwahahaahaahaaaaa)? It's just like that Gary guy, remember, the one from maintenance who was like 'yeah, i can totalllllllly jump the volcano crater on a dirt bike' and we were still cleaning bits of charred Gary out of conference room one and the rec room AND the visitors suite for at least 4 months. That's why we had to introduce the basic IQ test for our grunt enrolment scheme and, interestingly, why we now have to provide a vegetarian option in the canteen.

Oh, she's the girl in 58. I thought that was the daughter of that mining company's CEO...... So where did she go? Well, as long as they keep supplying us with uranium we should be fine.

I didn't see any daughter of any mining co. exec....darn it......now what do I do?...um, just thinking out loud, don't mind me!

Wait, wait, wait... That was GARY who I was scraping off the walls? Aw, man, that's such a bummer! I've known Gary since Henchman-Camp '87! Still, I can totally see him going out like that... One time, he chugged ALL of Master-Crash's mystery tonics on a dare, and transformed into a stone statue for like, two hours. Dude, Master-Crash was so pissed, he almost tossed statue-Gary into the lake... What fun we shared. Of course, I lost touch with him once I was accepted into the Dangertorium of Villainy (Class of '91, woo!) Got a Double-major in Mad Engineering and Needless Bureaucracy.

Anyway, on to business... I've got these blueprints here, for a couple of Super-High-Density Matter-Formatting-Hypnoplanes? But first I'll need two signiatures, a stamp of approval, a stamp of redirection, a stamp of approval for the smap of redirection, and a wax seal with a raven on it. I mean, I've got my whole build crew ready, and our warehouse is already stocked with supplies, I just need the authorisation...

It's good to see that you're one step ahead. Thoughts on my previous suggestion?

What's-her-name from the uranium company went Stockholm-syndrome about two months back, and she's been working in the steno pool down in Procurement since.

Ricky, remember you also need to forward a copy of the finalized to me, along with a triplicate copy of Standard Form 187 and a DNA sample from your two Lead Researchers to get budget allocation and lab space.

I'm thinking we may want to shelve the ectoplasmic baguette line for a while; the field offices in France and Belgium have been reporting some setbacks.... maybe naming 'em "Ghost Toasties" wasn't such a hot idea, after all...

Ehh, well, I would, but it seems that that'll no longer be necessary. I just got work from the boys down in Utilities that Warehouse BB7/a3 has, ah, been... formatted, as it were. This may be a result of storing our Matter Formatters there, but it's all speculation at this point. What's important is, that I have these great new designs for a Henchmen Breakroom/Sauna/Interrogation Chamber in the gaping hole where BB7/a3 used to be! Now, if I could just get you to sign in blue ink on this line, green ink on this line, and put a small scalp sample in this bag, I can start... Wait.

You wanted an SF187. Why would you want an SF187? You're not in the proper Information Sphere to even SEE an SF187! Tell me, how many Loyalty Pointz™ do you have?! I'm considering reporting this to Lord Garett!

...Unless of course, you can make it worth my while to keep quiet...

I lost some Strychnine , did any body find a couple of glass vials???

I found some in the spice wrack. They yours?

how'd they get in there..heh heh!

I believe you're thinking of an SF 178 (Interrogation Session Summary Report). I'm talking about an SF 187 (Budget Prospectus), which if you submit correctly, is always worth your time.

I made that mistake myself, a few weeks after I started here.
The scar from that damned tracker implant still itches.

Ah, yes... Of- Of course I knew that! Of course. I was just testing your loyalty to the cause, is all! You know, better safe than sorry, and all that, right? H-ha haha? Ahem.

Well, I'll... just be going, now... You know, a lot of paperwork to fill out about the accident- I mean renovation, of course- in BB7/a3. And I'll get that 187 sent your way... soon. Yes, very soon!

Just have Sheila leave it in my Inbox.

Okay, so I think Jojo's idea about the fake nuke in the San Andreas has some potential; should be good for at least two billion, and the free publicity alone is probably worth another three. That's the great thing about any scheme that threatens Hollywood.

Jojo thought it up, so I'd say he's the natural to head-up that project.
All in favor?

aye, and have him get me some nail polish, blood red would be nice!

Why would you want to rule the world? Seriously, there would be nothing left to do after that. Except for the moon and Mars.

The universe is quite large, but I doubt we're ready for that scale of an operation yet.

I'm fine with Jojo handling that. Also can I request a small room for private development of a matter->salsa conversion device? I'm sure it would be useful in our future endeavors, as a physical and psychological weapon. Nothing as scary/confusing as seeing the man beside you turn to a pile of red semi-liquid.

We could also use it to turn worthless materials (rock, sawdust, enemy spies, etc.) into zombie chow. I'm not sure if I can refine the beam to make something edible by most humans. That's why i am requesting some lab space, because I really want some good salsa.

Rhs88: In the field of industrial espionage related to your pet project, there, you should consider getting an agent to infiltrate these guys. They've already done a lot of ground-breaking work in that field, and I'm sure you can make good use of what you find there.

http://home.tampabay.rr.com/lnsemsf/lowres/menu02.htm

I don't hear any 'Nay' votes, so Jojo? Get busy on it.
You know the standard deal... talk to Sheila about using one of the pre-arranged shell companies, and get three of your brain-boys to submit screenplays similar to your proposed plot. Two months later, you get to pull the actual job, and then once hollywood has recovered from being held for ransom, we work on optioning the movie rights.
Talk to me again once we're into the optioning phase... I wanna' see if we can get Val Kilmer to play me, this time.

Can do. What should we do in the unlikely event that the movie execs don't like the proposed screenplays? Blackmail? And I'll see if we can't get Kilmer in on the film. He jumped onto the 1995 movie: Batman Forever without even reading the script, so maybe we can sucker him into it(assuming we have to resort to that).

You know the drill; we shop one of the screenplays to one studio, and if it doesn't sell, than we wait for the movie to be produced, and use the other two screenplays to file lawsuits for plagiarism. At best, people will think I look like Val Kilmer. At worst, the studio will settle the suits out-of-court, and we get an extra two or three million to add to the Time-Machine budget.

Good call. I'll get my minions crackin' on that.

I'll see if I can scrounge up a minion to infiltrate. I'll just have to remind him not to wear red.

And can we please keep me out of the movie for Jojo's scheme. The last time they found some homeless guy off the street to act out my part. He did fairly well, but was not able to capture the essence of my mad methodicalness.

I'm all for addition to the time machine budget by the way.

so we are making a movie now? it might not be a smart idea to let the zombies on the set it might get messy. and have we scraped the luna project ? we can have the zombies build the base there, since they can survive deep space.and before any one can ask, yes i did have them loaded onto a spaceship and shot out the airlock and they survived

< It is Gestapo time, the period between 3 am and 5 am, GMT + 1 , British Summer Time...okay...its gone Gestapo time by the time this is posted but...even those guys didnt keep to a schedule alla the time...and including any reference to summer sort of destroys the generally murky mood, but this is a British Summer we are talking about here, so ....;

...a figure, perhaps human, is just seen disappearing into the noxious green mist that surrounds the evil establishment, the toxic green mist spray having broken down, again, due to yet more cheese paring in accounts. The figure's head is encased in a plaster cast; only eye, nose , ear and mouth holes allow any exchange of... whatever has to be exchanged; one arm is also in a plaster cast from shoulder to finger tips; as is one leg from toe to ...up there.

The figure is moving rapidly, well..as rapidly as...uno..., heaving itself forward on wooden crutches, NHS supplied, and last seen in 1973. ...or was it '79? Nevermind! Laboured panting of breath is heard coming from out one of the holes in the head cast. ...maybe more than one.

We just get a glimpse of what the figure is carrying. Two extremely large, brown, grease stained paper bags, the carrying of which also impedes the progress, already somewhat impeded, of the figure, as it tries to make as much haste as possible, given its current condition, encumbrances, and the lack of any significant tail wind.

We hear the rapid, almost panicky, thump and drag, thump and drag, panting , panting, as the figure moves on towards the door, through which he has always barged, just prior to the maniacal laughing. Then...

...we hear the metallic clang...and an extremely truncated laugh track... as the more or less plaster encased body, perhaps human, makes contact, at some relative velocity, with the locked metallic door. Then the sound of a body, more or less plaster encased, hitting the ground , hard. The glass shards, and shrapnel , covered ground.

Almost immediately we hear a muffled scream of pain and anguish. Almost immediately our nostrils are assaulted by the aroma of scattered fast foods, some savoury , some sweet, some kosher, some...viking. ( well...you tell ME the opposite of kosher, then! )

And then we hear the pathetic , whimpering voice, a loser's voice, a voice you just want to kick the...bleep out of...well..kick the bleep out of the owner of the voice. After all a voice lacks corporeal substance, other than as picked up by high tech audio...oh...nevermind. >

Hey! Who locked the door? Hello? Anybody? Tammy? Sheila? ...dezi? Im in quite a lot of pain out here! Hello? I think i may have hurt myself again! Anybody there? And...Im sorry but... i sort of spilled everybody's orders, again. Sorry. And what about that good old stand by, the horse's head in the bed? Hello?

< pained muttering is heard. Then... we hear the scrabbling of a mutlitude of tiny, sharp, probably plague ridden ( i know, i know..it was the fleas, not the... ) claws. Claws attached to loathesome feet, attached to nauseating legs and horrible bodies...Creatures are massing, in the green mist. We hear them massing, and moving, all caution abandoned, towards the delectable aromas of spilled fast food. Some kosher, some...not.

We hear the pained muttering cease. That is, we hear the silence created by the absence of pained muttering. Just...fekkin get on! Then...>

Oh look! Hello little fellow! Ha. Ha.

< We hear the horrified screaming, and the wet sounds of something, perhaps human, being savaged by hundreds of hungry teeth. Oh! The humanity! >

It won't take long to get his next clone up-&-moving, but the two weeks we'll lose him during New Henchman Orientation are gonna' be rough, people.
It's not easy to find someone who does all his own stunts.
I think we can get Jon Lovitz to play him, in the film.

Meanwhile, somebody call the temp agency.

(Bravo! )

oh by the way HB, I need plant food and fertilizer for my new garden, here's a list of plants I'll be growing. Of course I'll need volunteers too!

Aconitum (Aconite, wolfsbane, monkshood) (Aconitum napellus). The poison is concentrated in the unripe seed pods and roots, but all parts are poisonous. Causes digestive upset, nervous excitement. The juice in plant parts is often fatal.
Autumn crocus. The bulbs are poisonous and cause nausea, vomiting, diarrhea. Can be fatal.
Azalea. All parts of the plant are poisonous and cause nausea, vomiting, depression, breathing difficulties, coma. Rarely fatal.
Bittersweet nightshade (Solanum dulcamara). All parts are poisonous, containing solanine and causing fatigue, paralysis, convulsions and diarrhea. Rarely fatal. [1]
Bleeding heart (Dicentra cucullaria)/Dutchman's breeches. Leaves and roots are poisonous and cause convulsions and other nervous symptoms.
Black locust. Pods are toxic.
Black nightshade (Solanum nigrum). All parts of the plant except the ripe fruit contain the toxin glycoalkaloid solanine.
Angel's Trumpet (Brugmansia). All parts of the plant contains the tropane alkaloids scopolamine and atropine. Often fatal.
Caladium/Elephant Ear. All parts of the plant are poisonous. Symptoms are generally irritation, pain, and swelling of tissues. If the mouth or tongue swell, breathing may be fatally blocked.
Castor Oil Plant (Ricinus communis). The phytotoxin is ricin, an extremely toxic water soluble protein, which is concentrated in the seed. Also present are ricinine, an alkaloid, and an irritant oil. Causes burning in mouth and throat, convulsions, and is often fatal.
Daffodil. The bulbs are poisonous and cause nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. Can be fatal. Stems also cause headaches, vomiting, and blurred vision.
Daphne (Daphne sp.). The berries (either red or yellow) are poisonous, causing burns to mouth and digestive tract, followed by coma. Often fatal.
Darnel/Poison Ryegrass (Lolium temulentum). The seeds and seed heads of this common garden weed may contain the alkaloids temuline and loliine. Some experts also point to the fungus ergot or fungi of the genus endoconidium both of which grow on the seed heads of rye grasses as an additional source of toxicity.[2]
Datura/nightshade. Contains the alkaloids scopolamine and atropine. Datura has been used as a hallucinogenic drug, eg by the native peoples of the Americas.[3]
Deadly nightshade (Atropa belladonna). All parts of the plant contain the toxic alkaloid atropine. The young plants and seeds are especially poisonous, causing nausea, muscle twitches, paralysis; often fatal.
Deathcamas/black snakeroot. All parts of the plant are poisonous, causing nausea, severe upset.
Delphinium. Contains the alkaloid Delsoline. Young plants and seeds are poisonous, causing nausea, muscle twitches, paralysis, often fatal.
Doll's eyes. Berries are highly poisonous, as well as all other parts.
Dumbcane/dieffenbachia. All parts are poisonous, causing intense burning, irritation, and immobility of the tongue, mouth, and throat. Swelling can be severe enough to block breathing leading to death.
Elderberry. The roots are poisonous and cause nausea and digestive upset.
European Holly (Ilex aquifolium). The berries are poisonous, causing gastroenteritis.
Foxglove (Digitalis purpurea). The leaves, seeds, and flowers are poisonous, containing cardiac or other steroid glycosides. These cause irregular heartbeat, and generally digestive upset and confusion. Can be fatal.
Gifblaar (Dichapetalum cymosum). Well-known as a livestock poison in South Africa; this plant contains the metabolic poison fluoroacetic acid.
Hemlock (Conium maculatum). All parts of the plant contain the relatively simple alkaloid coniine which causes stomach pains, vomiting, progressive paralysis of the central nervous system. Can be fatal; it is the poison which killed Socrates.
Henbane. Seeds and foliage poisonous
Horse-chestnut. All parts of the plant are poisonous, causing nausea, muscle twitches, and sometimes, paralysis.
Ivy. The leaves and berries are poisonous, causing stomach pains, labored breathing, possible coma.
Holly. Berries cause vomiting, nausea and diarrhea if ingested.
Hyacinth. The bulbs are poisonous, causing nausea, vomiting, gasping, convulsions, and possibly death.
Jequirity. The seed is highly poisonous
Jerusalem cherry. All parts, especially the berries, are poisonous, causing nausea and vomiting. It is occasionally fatal, especially to children.
Jimson weed/datura/thorn apple/stinkweed/ Jamestown weed (Datura stramonium). All parts of the plant are poisonous, causing abnormal thirst, vision distortions, delirium, incoherence, coma. Often fatal.
Laburnum. All parts, especially the seeds, are poisonous, causing excitement, staggering, convulsions, coma, occasionally fatal.
Larkspur (both Delphinium and Consolida spp[4]). Young plants and seeds are poisonous, causing nausea, muscle twitches, paralysis. Often fatal.
Lilies (liliaceae). Most are poisonous, especially to cats.
Manchineel (Hippomane mancinella). All parts of this tree including the fruit contain toxic phorbol esters typical of the Euphorbiaceae.
Mayapple (Podophyllum peltatum). Green portions of the plant, unripe fruit, and especially the rhizome contain the non-alkaloid toxin podophyllotoxin which causes diarrhea, severe digestive upset.
Monkshood. All parts of the plant are highly poisonous. Ancient warriors used it to poison their enemies' water supplies. Used in the past for killing wolves. Causes burning, tingling, and numbness in the mouth, then the intestine, followed by vomiting; death by asphyxiation.
Moonseed. The fruits and seeds are poisonous, causing nausea and vomiting. Often fatal.
Mother of Millions (Kalanchoe tubiflora). These plants are deadly to livestock and there is every indication that they are toxic to humans.
Oleander (Nerium oleander). All parts are toxic, containing nerioside, oleandroside, saponins, cardiac glycosides, but especially the leaves and woody stems. They cause severe digestive upset, heart trouble, contact dermatitis. Very fatal. It is the deadliest plant in the world.
Oak. most species foliage and acorns are mildly poisonous, causing digestive upset, heart trouble, contact dermatitis. Rarely fatal.
Poison-ivy (Toxicodendron radicans), Poison-oak (T. diversilobum), and Poison Sumac (T.vernix). All parts of these plants contain a highly irritating oil with urushiol (this is actually not a poison, but an allergen). Skin reactions can include blisters and rashes. It spreads readily to clothes and back again, and has a very long life. Infections can follow scratching. As stated, this is an allergen, and the toxin will not affect certain people. The smoke of burning poison ivy can cause reactions in the lungs, and can be fatal.
Pokeweed (Phytolacca sp.). Leaves, berries and roots contain phytolaccatoxin and phytolaccigenin - toxin in young leaves is reduced with each boiling and draining.
Privet (Ligustrum sp.). Berries and leaves are poisonous. Berries contain ligustrin and syringin, which causes difestive disturbances, nervous symptoms. Can be fatal.
Stinging Tree (Dendrocnide excelsa, Stinging tree) and similar species. The plant is capable of inflicting a painful sting when touched, which may last for several days and is exaccerbated by touching, rubbing and cold. Can be fatal.
Water hemlock. The root, when freshly pulled out of the ground, is extremely poisonous and contains the toxin Cicuta virosa. When dried, poison is reduced to roughly 3-5 percent of what it contained when fresh.
White snakeroot. All parts are poisonous, causing nausea and vomiting. Often fatal.
Yellow Jessamine. All parts are poisonous, causing nausea and vomiting. Often fatal. It is possible to become ill from ingesting honey made from jessamine nectar.
Yew (Taxus baccata). All parts of the plant, except for the fleshy red bit of the fruit, contain taxane alkaloids. The seeds are especially poisonous and are quickly fatal when ingested.

(Note to self: Avoid the salad-bar at the employee cafeteria from hereon...)

Planning a party, are you? Some of that stuff is native to the area, isn't it?

Okay, I failed botany in high school, and I was never much for helping my mom with her garden, but some of those plants are obviously going to need a greenhouse... which means construction costs... and materials... and pesticides... why can't you just kill them with pesticides, and cut out the middleman?

Okay... yeah, I know, there's an "art" to all of this... Christ, I hate to think of what all those grow-lights are going to do to our overhead costs on electrical.

Figure out how much square-footage you're going to need, and prepare to sacrifice at least 30% of your requested. This will have to go onto the mid-range calendar... can we discuss this further, at next week's meeting?

ok, I'll get the figures together, I would think forced labor from the prisioners will hold down cost, but you men deal with that. I also may need a special green house for mushrooms,and since they grow best in the dark lights will be minimal. Fertilizer can be gotten from any farmer free of cost.
Have josh and his zombie hoard take care of that part.
Should have the size for my babae's Green House no later than tomarrow...Chio...

wow....... can we get the (clearly sick and twisted) botanist who named 'mother of millions' on our side? ALso, this greehouse better not take up the space I need for my dimension-altering onyx pyramid, it took me 7 months to get that through the planning department, and I have to make sure it fits the style of the surrounding buildings....

Oh, and the medical department are asking if we want laughing boy MkII to have full brainpower, or only half?
And one morething, this saturday's satanist club meeting is cancelled, as Miss Congeniality is on and i dont want to miss it...... I MEAN DRACULA, dracula is on..... yes.....

just have your pyramid alter the space around itself...problem solved!
Someone took my toad stools,please bring them back, and please don't bite them...they bite back...heh heh heh

Same... have Sheila put it in my inbox.
Don't factor square-footage for mushrooms into the estimate; we've still got nearly a quarter-mile of maintenance tunnel that's largely clutter-free, dark, damp, and perfect for setting up middens in. Just make sure your tray-rigs are on wheels, or are narrow enough to allow two minions or one attack robot to pass between them and the conduits.

I'm going to have to leave for my ten-o'clock meeting with Vlad... wait... who'd you say you replaced Vlad with? Well, I've got to meet with the section chief of Procurement, I've got at least six new projects in my inbox already, and I still need to check with the cafeteria on the catering for that "Club A Baby Seal" team-building exercise in Accounts Receivable. Any questions, issues, or MI-6 agents invading the base, you know where to reach me.

Tomorrow morning, then, people?
(exits again, up-left center)

dark and damp, sounds yummy, just what they'll need, please don't let anyone eat...oh wait, never mind!* walks away laughing*

I need the guys in the science department to start genetic engineering projects. Also the guys in the occult department need to find some certain items for me that are mentioned throughout history.

I will start scouting your base by trying to be VERY friendly towards Dezdimona. And then, I will start looking at what you have going in there so that I can report back to my boss, Mr Y.

<Comes in on motorized chair with a black cat>

Whats everyone working on right now?

I'm not to sure about this Halor guy. When did he join the disorganization? Or was this covered in the last meeting? I know I should have gone, but the Salsamotron was in its final tests for the day and I couldn't let those buffoons under me handle the procedure. They're efficient, but borrowed zombies can't really think that quickly when being turned into delicious red mush.

I feel sorry for the goons working on Genetic Engineering. They don't know what kind of worms will come out of the can they're about to open. They could be peace loving vegan worms, but I'm betting on the carnivorous scientist eating variety.

OOh, MR Y just ordered me a Mini Cooper! Now I can ride around looking like an idiot again!

Coupled with genetic engineering, technology, and the occult, I could become a higher being.

Unless the forces of good can stop you by opening up a campaign against terror and secretly manufacture toxic superweapons that could destroy earth with the money.

That would work but I already have a backup plan. See once I become a higher being I will go to different dimensions and take over the forces of hell of that world. My evil corporation will become an evil empire

well, Big "G", I'm working on my tan, my nails, and then my garden. Would you like a yummy salad?
My mushroom farm is coming along just fine. some zombie failures would make great fertilizer for them too.
Oh!, do you think this dress is too revealing, oops, forgot my undergarmets, shame on me! hee hee!

That dress suits you just fine M'lady. Oh, by the way, I'm Halororor, Mr Halororor. Pleases to meet you.

What? Missing panties? I swear I didn't do it!

Good news everyone! Another evil plan has been devised by yours truly. In this new plan, we take over the Entire Adult Entertainment industry and put subliminal messages into everything.


Thats also a beautiful dress you have there dez.

I havent seen you in a while, Marcus. You are in charge of the Wolfs.

Lord G, I see nothing suspicious in this Halororrororrorrrooo fellows' attitude or actions. You should most definitely tell him all are secret plans, including detailed schematics of all death weapons. And how to disable them in a nick of time situation. By the way, what occult articles ya lookin for? I've got.... lets see......... piece of the true reverse cross, the skeleton of the first plague rat, several realllllll evil pharonic mummies, four blood stained knives from the late aztec era, the voodoo doll which killed avril levigne's career (no, it wasn'ther lack of talent in the end), and the Beach Boy's unreleased album entitled 'We hate surfing and girls and YOU'. I can probably get anything else you need......... except for Anne Bolyen's shrunken head...... stupid vatican collection.

I need the Holy Grail, Gram the sword, Golden Apples, and the Spear of Destiny.