...making people stop fighting me? i tried a simple calm humanoid spell but it didn't work.

and also is there a command for making people talk to me even if they have a "goodbye" dialoge?

i have tried looking in the tes construction set help file where all commands are supposed to be listed, but it just made me confused. i also tried looking at various internet sites without finding anything, so please help me!

A calm humanoid spell only works if it is strong enough. The higher the level of the target, the stronger you need.

There's no command to make people talk to you I think without the goodbye, unless you can somehow select a different line for them to say which doesn't have the goodbye function on.

Some console commands (Doesn't have setscale though, which is one of my favorites )

Intimidation (speechcraft option) permanently lowers an NPC's hostility, but requires you to talk to them before they enter into combat with you. It also causes them to dislike you the next time you talk to them, but you can just Admire or bribe them to get a higher disposition. There are several ways to achieve this:
--Calm Humanoid (on NPC).
--Invisibility (self).
--Chameleon (self), then sneak up to them.
--Command Humanoid (on NPC). I don't recommend using this unless you're far better at conjuration than illusion.
setfight can be used to prevent an NPC from attacking in the first place, but I don't think it works if they've already attacked you.
stopcombat will cause the NPC to cease attacking. However, I'm pretty sure that if the NPC's fight level is what caused them to attack in the first place (as opposed to startcombat player), this will just cause them to pause until they notice you again.

forcegreet will cause the actor to enter into dialogue regardless of position, although I believe it's only applicable to NPCs in the loaded cell(s).

I didn't know about the lowered hostility, thanks.