Note this is a piece to be performed on stage in front of an audience, not a short story. Feedback - unlikely though it is in these forums - would be appreciated.


THE YOUTH

Andy enters with a rucksack and stares around, wide-eyed.

Phew! What a place!

Eh?

If you're talking to me, Binnet, I can't hear you properly. Can't you wait?

(Pause) A good spot this. Fresh and green. That's how we like it. Fresh and green.

Andy takes deep breaths, soaking up the atmosphere.

Well. That's how I like it. I'm never sure about you. You're into some weird stuff there.

(Pause) It's all right. I'm not going to talk about it. Not if you don't want to. But…

(Pause) Annie used to say it was better to talk than keep it all inside. Do you remember Annie? A long time ago now, wasn't it?

"Come on, Andy. You know you shouldn't hide things."

(Pause) Someone wrote a poem once. About this kid who lay on the grass up in the hills like this and looked down over the coloured counties. Can't you see them all spread out below? Annie told me about that. Coloured counties. It's right, somehow, isn't it?

(Pause) She taught me a lot, did Annie. And not just poetry and all that crap. How you've got to behave, you know, to survive, to be a real person. She always said we had to be careful in case we stopped being real people.

“It's so easy to become a number, Andy. And you say 'oh no, not me, I'll never be a number.' But you just become one because it takes an effort to be more than a number and nobody wants to make an effort. Don't get like that, eh, lad?”

(Pause) “ Never lie”, that's what she said. “Or cheat. Or steal.” Couldn't get through to you though, could she? Maybe she didn't try hard enough. You kept on getting us into trouble. But it wasn’t my fault, was it?

(Staring out) Oh, look! There's a little stream down there. We could go and have a picnic on the bank. But it looks a bit wet. And the grass is long. You don't like long grass, do you? Yeah. Why not let's stay up here for a bit. Annie would have loved it. She adored views.

Course, we never saw any views together.

You know, it makes me sad. She was around for such a long time. Annie and me. Felt like we were married. And yet, we never got to see any views.

(Pause) Maybe she can see views now. Do they have views in heaven, Binnet?

(Pause) Do you think she's in heaven? She couldn't have gone to that other place? I mean, she was a bit naughty at times.

"Andy, you're fifteen now. It's time you learned what men and women do together."

Course, I did know. Used to watch her doing it with Keiffy in number 16 and Ricky in number 25, didn't I! Didn't seem quite right with her being so old. I thought she liked me.

How old do you reckon she was, Binnet? Forty, fifty?

(Pause) Seems quiet without Annie.

(Pause) Yeah. We'll stay up here for a bit. Annie's place we'll call it.

Andy pulls a ground sheet from the rucksack and sits.

I wonder where we are?

Andy rummages in the rucksack and pulls out a pack of sandwiches which he starts to eat.

I bought these in that village shop but I can't remember the name of the place. Do you? Terrible with places. People - I can recognise them. Names and faces. But streets don't do anything for me. Can't even remember the name of…

(Pause) Hey, Binnet, where was it? You know, with Keiffy, Ricky, Sam, Annie and all the rest. We was there for yonks.

How can I see all of them as clearly as if it was yesterday but I don't remember where? Annie used to forget things but she was old. We're not. Well, I'm not. How old are you?

(Silence) Do you think they know we've gone? Ricky was telling me they can't always tell, you know, afterwards. He was clever, wasn't he? Wish I was clever.

"Books, Andy, anything you want to know will be written down somewhere. Or on computer. Get a computer."

Bit of a joker, wasn't he? Always said he'd buy me a computer one day. Wonder if he meant it?

I'm not sure I want to know stuff, though. I mean, look out there. Don't know where it is, where we're going, where we've been. I like that. It feels - free. Before, we always knew - what we were going to get to eat, when we could play outside, what jobs I'd have to do. Ricky said it was good. How did he put it?

"Routine, man. If there's a routine, you can allow your brain to fly. It works on autopilot. Set your imagination free."

Never knew what he was on about.

But I like being me - and you, of course. Not knowing what's going to happen next. It's important then - it matters. If you can tell - all that routine - well then it isn't important. It doesn't mean anything - it just happens.

Do you get me? I'm probably not saying it very well. Sometimes I want to say things but can't find the right words. Like I wanted to say goodbye to Annie.

"Come on, Andy. Why the long face? I'll be back tomorrow."

Huh! She didn’t know your plans, did she?

Oh dear, here I am rabbiting on about what we can and can't see and you can't see anything. I'll let you have a look.

Andy rummages in the rucksack and pulls out an odd looking piece of wood or a broken toy. He sits it up.

Is that better?

(Contemplating the wood/toy) You must be pretty pissed off being cooped up in there all day. Maybe we can get you attached to the bag. Would you like that? Yeah. Course you would. You'd see it all then.

(Pause) When I first went to - wherever it was - seems yonks ago now - it was all so huge. I didn't mind at all. Not after mum and dad died and that. Their house was so small. This was like a whole new world. Well, it seemed like a world to me then. But it got smaller, Binnet. That's why I couldn't stay there.

They kept taking me back, though. Last time Annie was really cross. Why couldn’t she understand, Binnet? She ought to have understood!

Why did it get smaller?

Ricky was wrong. The more you know, the smaller it all gets. If you knew everything it would all shrivel up like those peas Keiffy had for his pea shooter. Remember? Before they took it away.

Look out there. I don't know anything, so it's massive, huge, endless. We can explore. What's the use of being anywhere when there's nothing to explore?

Ricky's exploring a new place now. Wonder what he'll find? If he knows it all…

(Pause) He was a pain but…

(Pause) What shall we do now, eh, Binnet? Walk?

Sing! You want me to sing?

No. Singing’s for when we work. In the garden or whatever.

I suppose I shall have to work. Ricky told me all about money. Said it makes the world go round. Anyway, we have to work to earn money to live. Not yet. We've got (counts money) fifty-eight pounds. But when that's gone, we'll have to earn it.

Keiffy used to nick stuff, you know. Tried to nick you once. They all wanted to nick you. Why did they want to steal from me, Binnet? Why me?

You stole.

It’s wrong to steal.

Not if people are dead though. They can't want it any more, can they? I mean this wasn't stolen. No! Andy, the thief! You'll never hear anyone say that. Do you understand me? Never!

(Pause) Do you know what? You've never told me your real name. I remember when Annie found you. She was going to…

"You mustn't do that!"

"Do what?"

"This guy."

"Oh. Bin it."

"Bennett?"

"Bin it!"

But it's just a nickname, isn't it?

(Pause, sigh) Sometimes you're not very talkative. Keiffy used to talk. Couldn't stop him. Well, I suppose now…

"Hey, Andy, have you seen the new guy, Cliffy? He's got four rings in his nose! Why can't we have rings in our noses?"

"What do you want a ring in your nose for?"

"It's a statement."

"A statement of what?"

"Individuality."

"Individuality?"

"What do you know about it? You're as thick as a brick, you are. It's to show them, isn't it?"

"Who?"

"Them! The ones who aren't us!"

He was a nutter. I don't mind about him so much. I won’t miss him. I don't mind about any of them really. Except Sam.

Sam was only little. Well not little - I mean, he was bigger than me and older than me - but his brain was little. They had to help him eat. But even he tried to steal you Binnet!

(Pause) Here. It was a bit of luck, wasn't it? That strange kid wandering in out of the woods like that. I mean, us finding him. That's how I knew it was meant to happen.

Ricky and I used to talk about it, you know. If we ever did it there'd have to be someone else or they'd know we got away. The numbers wouldn't add up.

I didn't like hurting him, though. But you didn't mind, did you? I could hear you screaming at me to hurt him. Why did you want him to hurt, Binnet? He never did anything to you or me. Not like mum and dad. They needed to be hurt but not this kid.

I never even knew his name. I should have found out his name. He's got my name now so I should take his. Except, I don't want his name. I want mine. It's the only thing nobody's never taken away from me. Christ, Keiffy wasn't half wrong. Who gives a shit about wearing a ring? It's your name. That's what makes you different - makes you special. It's what makes you 'you'. I don't want him to have my name, Binnet. I don't. I don't!

(Pause) And yet… Look down there. At all this. I mustn't lose that. Names don’t matter that much. Look at you. And it must have been meant to happen else why was everything there? The petrol, all that dry wood, the kid you made me hurt.

I'm glad I didn't have to watch this time. With mum and dad. Well, it wasn't much fun really. Not like I'd thought. I can remember them popping, you know, as bits of them burst. And the smell. I remember the smell. But I couldn't laugh. I wanted to laugh like they used to laugh at me. But…

Do you think I was a bit naughty? But they shouldn’t have tried to steal from me.

They've all gone now though, haven't they?

(Pause) Annie used to tell me… Do you remember Annie? Such a long time ago now, wasn't it? (Pause) Or was it? I was never very good with places or times. But names is okay. It was definitely Annie. (Pause) Wasn't it?

(Long silence) It's so quiet up here.

Exit, leaving the puppet.

Cunning, Malchik! That's the word. Cunning! I can see how this would be better suited for the stage. Still, it's a good read! And I read it twice in an attempt to grasp the different personalities. But I still have more questions than answers! And somehow I've got a feeling that that's what you wanted...

Woah. I'm impressed, Malchik, i really am. And yet, i'm not sure why...

I'm not much for symbolism and the stage, because i don't really understand it. I found myself as i read trying to figure everything out in my head; who are all the people, are they all personalities of Andy (or one of the others), what did he do, what's the significance of Annie...

I've now sort of realised that its unnecessary. Instead of reading into the play and concentrating on working it all out, i should just read it, and let it all (hopefully) come to me.

*****

I've jsut re-read it, and i still don't understand it all, but i think thats probably how you meant it to be. In a very small space you've crafted several characters and made them all impact on one another, interesting the audience. I'm not sure about what a monologue is, but i'm assuming its meant to be a single act/chapter/scene, not part of a larger play. I think thats the right way to do this type of thing as well, because if you went into more detail you might lose the, um, the mystique? that surrounds the characters (wrong word, but i can't think of the right one at the moment).

All in all, over my head but very deep and very good!

loveme4whoiam, a monologue is a scene in which the character speaks by himself. Depending on the play, a monologue can address the audience directly or reveal the character's thoughts. One of the most famous monologues of all time is Shakespeare's "To be, or not to be" speech in Hamlet.

Malchik, since this is a monologue does this mean that Andy suffers multiple personality disorder and is having a conversation with his one of his alternate personalities?

BTW - This is a good a place to ask as any, WTF is your avatar!? It kind of looks like a snake or reptile head looked at from the front, but that is as much as I can dicipher.

I like the writing, really really do... But since I dont speak english and since I'm kinda slow on the brain it was hard for me to understand it a bit but somehow I feel like that was a bit of your idea. I like the story, I like the wiritng just dont really know what to make out of it...

Thanks for the comments.

A monologue is not meant to be read, of course, it's to be seen and heard and an actor can make the individual characters 'live' with changes in body language and accent. The writer can help too by giving the other characters different speech patterns and I have tried that with Annie and Keiffy for example.

I hadn't seen Andy as having multiple personality disorder. He hears voices in his head but it is not him, paranoia seems a more appropriate term.

It's intentional that his 'illness' is not immediately obvious. I have seen it performed once and the end is really chilling. The audience took a moment before they applauded because the actor playing the part had all but mesmerised them. And then there was thunderous applause. Writer actor and director all play their part.

I'll post my semi-comic monologue, the Actress, later this week.

As for my Avatar. It's a painting by Beksinski a polish artist. It can be whatever you see in it. I see it as a floating city made of pipes that from a distance resembles a skull. You can check out various websites to get enlargements but be warned, some of the paintings are disturbing.

Note to Pack Rat - I will read your story and post later in the week. Next couple of days I'm really busy.

Np m8